Pee in the garden

by Robert the Serious Siamese

My brother Jacob asked me the other day why all humans in our family are peeing in his drinking bowl. Yes, that stupid brother of mine drinks from the toilets whenever he can.

Most of the time he can't because myPerson puts the lids down. It's supposed to be good Feng Shui to keep your toilet lid down.

But I must admit, Jacob had a rare bright moment there. His question is a good one; why on earth do humans pee in perfectly clean water, then flush it away with some more perfectly clean water.

Jacob and I pee in the garden, we'd never dream of doing it inside the house, even though myPerson maintains a catbox in the basement for rainy days (ha ha, isn't that sweet, obviously we never use it). We only pee outside and we don't mark our territory with stinky pee because we have been neutered when we were little. 

Neutered is a politically correct term for having your balls removed, here my brother Jacob and I are warming ours a few days before the operation.

But back to the topic. Urine is an excellent fertilizer. But it must be used with care. I know this from experience; I killed a plant once with my pee. 

And it was not just any plant, myPerson's mother had planted it for her. She came all the way from Finland, bought a peony (Paeonia Lactiflora) called "Mother's Choice", then she planted it with care and nurtured it with love throughout her two-week stay. Right where the peony was planted the soil was soft and I just couldn't help myself -it was the best spot. So I went there to empty my bladder time and time again and eventually the peony died. 

I wanted to share this story although it is a painful one. Luckily it all ended well, a new plant was brought in and I was kept away. The new plant flowered beautifully this summer. 

With this lesson learned under my belt and inspired by Jacob's question I did some Internet research. Amazing stuff out there. Looks like people much more clever than anyone I know have been thinking of this for quite some time already.

Some English students recently suggested one should pee in the shower. That would not work that well for us cats.

To Jacob's delight a whole town in Texas uses toilet water for drinking, but not quite the way Jacob does, though. There's some technology and chemistry involved.

And then there is the innovative concept of eliminating the water altogether, by using something that's called a separating toilet. Jacob was not in favour of this, but no-one's asking him.

All in all peecycling is an interesting topic and as a hint for those with a garden; there is a neat device called Guldkannan (=the Golden Can).

- Robert the Serious Siamese.